Gordon Ramsay at the London reopens as VaginaErectpenis

I went to Gordon Ramsay at the London hotel last night with some girlfriends as part of the dineLA promotion. It was easily one of the worst (if not the worst) dining experiences I have had in calendar year 2009. Service was poor, food was mediocre, and management was minimally apologetic and accommodating.

Most upsetting to me was the discovery that though we had made our reservation at Gordon Ramsay (and had to put down a card because we would be charged if we cancelled less than 48 hours in advance), we were seated at Boxwood, the “hotel restaurant” at the London. We couldn’t look at the Gordon Ramsay menu because we were not actually at Gordon Ramsay. We could order off of the Boxwood menu, which was effectively the room service menu for the London.

This is the equivalent of marketing your new novel as Great Expectations, selling copies of Everybody Poops, and assuming your readers won’t know the difference.

Conveniently, all of the items on the dineLA menu were found on the Boxwood menu, at a lower price point (i.e. the dineLA menu was set at $44, but any of the dineLA combinations ordered off the Boxwood menu were less than $44). When I asked the manager about this, he chuckled and said, “Well, everyone orders the dineLA menu.” I pressed further, and he explained that the higher price was due to larger portion size.

I still had a good time because it was nice to be out with my friends on a Tuesday night, and we got a chuckle from Lisa’s observation that Boxwood is another way of saying VanginaPenis, or more specifically, VaginaErectpenis. It is also a boring shrub. Way to go, corporate branding team!

UPDATE:

Two days after eating at the Gordon Ramsay (and writing the people at dineLA to let them know about my experience), I receieved this email:

Dear Ms. Crapser,

I am most concerned to read your comments regarding your experience at Gordon Ramsay at The London West Hollywood.

I sincerely apologize that you were mislead regarding the Dine LA program. The menu that our Executive Chef Andy Cook decided for the DineLA weeks is a combination of dishes that have been created solely for this event and some dishes that are in our current menus. We are currently offering this menu in the front and the back dining room.

We have addressed this with our staff to ensure that they are all clear as we certainly do not want to mislead out guests in anyway.

On your next visit to Gordon Ramsay at The London West Hollywood I would be delighted to offer you complimentary Champagne on arrival.

Please contact any of the team mentioned in this email to make the necessary arrangements.

If I can be of any further assistance please do not hesitate to contact me.

Yours sincerely,

Chiara

Chiara Tirapelle
Private Dining and Reservation Manager

Gordon Ramsay at The London West Hollywood

That's your idea of customer service? Unbelievable!